Friday, July 18, 2014

Not normal

Not normal.

I'm not normally a very emotional person. It's not normal for me to break down in tears. Multiple times in one day. But yesterday was a bad day. I'd like to chalk it up to pregnancy hormones, but I don't know if that is the full story...

For 8 weeks this summer, I took a 5 credit nursing class. Which means on top of the normal readings and Discussion Boards, I had to fit in 16 hours of clinical time that I had to set up, research and write what ended up being a 15 page community assessment, perform and write up a family assessment, and plan/promote a 30 minute health presentation to give in my community (that no one showed up for). It was a somewhat stressful 8 weeks. I was also 6-8 months pregnant, celebrated Little Man's 2nd birthday, ran a half marathon, and worked. One week after my class ended, we moved.

Written down, it does not seem normal. But I had help! :) Hubby was super supportive, friends pitched in to help with the birthday, and my amazing family got us all moved, set up, and mostly cleaned on moving day.

So, what right do I have to complain about not being normal?

Due to a genetic condition, I am considered high risk in pregnancy. Which means I am followed by a high risk OB with ultrasounds every 2 weeks in addition to seeing the regular OB. This usually means 2 hour appointments, with a 2 year old, every 2 weeks.

No big deal. That's my "normal."

Probably also due to the same genetic condition, I develop blood pressure issues in the last trimester of pregnancy - where it drops too low for some unknown reason, then rebounds and releases an adrenaline response to compensate. Last pregnancy, it meant multiple trips to the ER, getting established with a cardiologist and electrophysiologist, and wearing a Holter monitor for 30 days. This time, I see the electrophysiologist, have another heart monitor for 30 days, and schedule an echocardiogram.

It all kinda hit me yesterday. I had absolutely no energy left for anything except crying. Trying to manage my own health to adequately grow Baby Thunder, spend quality time with Little Man outside a doctor's office, and finish unpacking my new house is exhausting!

But, my sweet husband and motherreminded me yesterday that I am not alone. My family is here to support and help me when the need is known (like my dad spending this morning with Little Man so I wouldn't have to make him sit through my echo), and the Lord will continue to give strength to His children.

So no, my life is not normal. But I will continue to try and be grateful for what I do have - a God who loves and provides for His children, friends and family that will help when asked, and the most loving, understanding husband a girl could ask for!

Run the race, fight the good fight, and learn when - and how - to rest.

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